Just the same
by Wingless butterfly
Summary: He says its like fire in his veins.Simply states 'it just takes the pain away'.To me its just the same.Roxas sees Axel in his darkest moment but will he also succumb to his own dark desires?Oneshot


Just the same

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any characters from kingdom hearts so basically I own nothing but the plot so please don't sue me.

**Pairings:** Axel x Roxas

**Summary:** He says its like fire in his veins, simply states it just takes the pain away. To me it's just the same. Roxas see's Axel in his darkest moment but will he also succumb to his own dark desires? One-shot

**A/N: **Ok this is my first attempt at a kingdom hearts fanfic and surprisingly it's based on Roxas and Axel. Yes this is a one-shot. This fic is rated T for drug abuse, only slight cursing and yaoi (boy x boy) love. You have been warned!!! Otay!! Now for the story.

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He says its like fire in his veins. Simply states 'it just takes the pain away'. To me it's just the same...

I'm sitting in the far corner of his room watching with dull blue eyes as he brings the alcohol to his lips once again. Those exotic emerald eyes of his search my face for something and then he pulls the bottle away.

'_Why did I even bother to come here?'_

"Do you know what that bastard said to me today Roxas?" he slurred making his way over to me. I sigh softly when he stumbles and falls at my feet.

'_Why do I even try?'_

"Axel" I murmur running a hand through his fiery red hair... but he pushes my hand away. Sitting up he crawls to the dresser. I bite my bottom lip following his every move of course I knew what he would do next This fucked up night wouldn't be the same without it.

"Axel don't!" I say rushing over to him. But he's already pulling out the needle, the clear liquid not to far behind.

"He told me I wasn't good enough for anything but a good fuck. Do you believe that?" He looks at me with desperate eyes those same eyes I fell in love with.

"No Axel I don't believe that at all. Now please give me the drugs. Don't you see? You don't need them!" But he shakes his head no and I know he's not going to give up without a fight and I wasn't going through that again. Last time I tried he knocked me out cold. I didn't even wake up until the next morning with him shivering next to me from the drugs' after effects.

So I watch. Just sit and watch as he puts that liquid in his veins. I remember the first time I saw him do it (this was after his father had beat him senseless for not cooking the dinner he specifically asked for that night) when I asked him why he did it in the first place.

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Flashback 

"I don't understand Axel why do this to yourself? Don't you know the shit could probably kill you?"

He stares at me for a moment with soft emerald eyes and then...

"It's like fire in my veins...I become numb. There's no more pain. No one cares anyway. No one loves me enough to care."

"I do care Axel. I love you. You know I do but you never listen"

"You shouldn't love me, should never let anyone get to close. You'll only end up hurt in the end."

End Flashback

* * *

He clutches at his wrist Instinctively; needle long forgotten on the floor.

"Why do you stay? Why haven't you left me yet like everyone else has?" he asks. I look at him leaning against the wall, the way his face looks flushed, and eyes hold no more sparkle. But all I see is what we used to have.

"I told you before and I'll keep telling you until it get's through that thick skull of yours-" He looks at me expectantly and I see him do something that I haven't seen him do in a long time. I see him cry.

"I love you." I whispered standing up, "That's why I'm still hear to see that you don't end up dead because believe it or not I care about you." He brushes a strand of my blonde hair from my face before he leans toward my ear.

"You shouldn't love me you know. You'll only end up hurt in the end." I shiver slightly feeling that warm breath tickle my ear, the faint smell of alcohol over taking my senses.

He's right you know but it was a chance I was willing to take. He raises his head a bit before he captures my lips in a kiss. A hot passionate kiss that seems to shoot through my body. I cling to him as if for dear life his fingers fumbling slightly with the belt around my waist. We fall together as one on the bedroom floor.

The funny thing was I knew all too well about the feeling Axel was talking about. That heat, that undeniable fire that sent him wild. I felt it in his kiss and in his every touch. He gets his own pants undone and he spreads my legs looking at me with hungry green eyes. This was my way of showing him I cared. To sacrifice myself so that he could see how much I really loved him. I would never leave his side.

I guess deep down Inside I knew he never loved me in the first place but that's what I told myself to ease the pain. He kisses me again before plunging deep inside of me. I cry out or try to at least but his lips are locked onto mine. I grab onto him drinking him all in. No matter what I couldn't live without him and I was doing whatever it took to stay by his side.

It was like a fire in my veins...

Being with him like this took all the pain away but if I really think about it him and I are just the same.

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A/N: Wow I feel so proud of myself for actually getting this posted. Well reviews are definantly welcome. I want everyone's opinion on if it was good or not and if there's anything I need to Improve on. Oh and thanks for reading my first posted fan fiction. Bye! 


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